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Newcomers vs. old timers and joining together...

Learn about NerdNYC! Read the rules before posting!

Postby jenskot on Fri Nov 30, 2007 11:04 am


IngredientX recently made an amazing post that I think anyone new to nerdnyc should definitely read:

IngredientX wrote:One thing I've seen on this very site is the issue of the Core Nerds. It's not really a clique, because people are really just one Recess away from befriending people in the Core, and the Core is quite quick to embrace outsiders.

With other people, just having a Core would be a problem. It's to our advantage that our Core is made up of incredibly friendly and approachable people! But it's still a Core.

So please understand: I'm not being critical of the people inside the Core, or the fact that there is a Core. Like I said, the Core is made up of awesome people. But I've seen conflicts of Core vs. newcomers here, and I think they're worth mentioning. As we grow, we'll only see more of them.

* Now, when people in the Core message each other, there's usually light-hearted abuse and fun. But when someone outside the Core, especially a newcomer, posts something with an acerbic tone, he/she doesn't get the benefit of the doubt, and there's a backlash.

It's not always obvious to a newcomer that he/she can't write with the same tone as the Core. Some newcomers never accept this, and get angry. It is, to an extent, a double standard.

Do we clearly define who's in the Core? Do we change the way we post?

* Other times, someone with a personal philosophy that differs from the Core will post something, and there'll be a clear division between the Core and everyone else.

As we grow, this division will become more and more exagerrated. Different viewpoints will be exchanged, and there might be a time when the Core may be outranked and outvoted by a bloc of newcomers. This is exactly what happened on BGG.

Are we comfortable with that? Is it worth growing if, one day, we will have to surrender our control of the group to people we won't necessarily agree with?


Tekatana wrote:An amazingly insightful post.

I think the thing that makes this board function the way it does is many of the participants in this chunk of cyberspace see each other in "meat-space" and do not just interact on these boards. It's not a common thing for most b-boards on the web I am sure.

Friends behave differently with each other than semi-ananymous board posters do (naturally) and that carries over to the boards. That has a profound effect on everyone's posts, behaviors, styles, etc (lots of people will rise up in 'defense' when their friend is challenged for example). Those friends comprise the "core." And I don't think it's something that is necessarily detrimental or that needs fixing. It just is.

I would think a major part of the Nerdnyc goal would be to meet more people live and in person through events and GGG's and such. By doing so it expands the core, filling it with new people, who eventually become friends. Then that newly expanded core meets new people who become friends, etc. etc. until all nerds are united under one banner... and then we will change the face of Arakis. The Dice Must Flow!


JimB wrote:When I joined NerdNYC it was pretty obvious to me that there was a core group that I was not yet a part of. I knew without anyone telling me that I couldn't just jump right in being sarcastic, making fun of people or threatening to fuck their dads. As time went by and I developed friendships at NerdNYC, I allowed my posts to get more outrageous.

What I'm saying is that the Core issue never affected me because for me (and I think most people) it's pretty obvious how you should or shouldn't behave in a group that you're a new member of.

But, Ingrediantx, you are totally correct that there have been issues in the past when new members crossed lines that old members cross all the time. As far as a solution goes, I would say it would suffice to add a note to the site rules. Perhaps something like:

Because many members of NerdNYC are close friends, they often talk to each other in very familiar ways (sarcasm, insults, sex jokes, etc). If you are a new member, we look forward to the day that we know you so well that you can post like that, but until then please use common sense when posting on NerdNYC.


IngredientX wrote:Jimb, that's probably the best way! Hopefully our advice will be heeded...
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Postby shadowship on Thu Dec 06, 2007 8:51 pm


That's great. Can I summon some undead now??? Unforunately, most of my old crew on my Flying Dutchmen are worn out at this point..... :p :p :p
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Postby overeddie on Fri Dec 07, 2007 8:50 am


It doesn't take too long to get into the core. I'm pretty sure within hours of my first post here, Frank asked me about ass-grabbing.
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Postby machina on Fri Dec 07, 2007 1:23 pm


When I was in Markland(and I still love those guys and want to return someday), they had their original member mostly belonging to a very loose standard of a 'household.' They didn't always camp together entirely, but all of them got nicknames applied to them by the others like Spothead, NannyFodder, Cocohead, Babyhead, etc, etc. Mostly ending in -head. The result was Headclan, and even if you weren't part of it they probably had a nickname for you behind your back if you were old enough or around long enough.

Headclan, while I was actively in Markland, ended up leading this non-profit organization for the most part, running or supervising most events. Even when leadership posts have opened up, almost no one steps up so often the old school sticks around like it or not. I have assumed that your old school people are a lot like them, passionate and involved, mature and open-minded. People who lead through example and share what they enjoy with whomever show up.

I've watched as newbies appear one event and disappear for weeks on end. Time after time, one member or another would carry out traditions of extending friendship, and sharing their experiences that brought them into this club. Maybe its luck, fate, destiny, what-have-you, that certain people can get themselves not just into a club, or create a club, but build a club up and keep it going and growing when it seems like nothing else can. A green thumb for human social interaction.

I don't mind the Core here. So far I like 'em well enough, am sorry I still haven't met them, and am sort-of hoping I haven't pissed them off. (yet?!?)
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